Deep POV and How It’s Used? by Richard Draude

Deep POV is the third-person subjective taken a step beyond the normal third-person subjective. Deep POV shows your story through the eyes of one or more characters—one at a time please, avoid any head-hopping. Deep POV goes into the head and heart of a character, taking your readers beyond the action on the page, thus allowing you, the writer, to help your readers understand your character’s thoughts, his or her experiences, history, and feelings.

What first-person POV executes with the I narration, Deep POV accomplishes with third-person he or she narration.

Using Deep POV puts your readers inside your viewpoint character. They feel story events as your hero or heroine does. What your protagonist or antagonist sees, the reader sees. What they feel or think, the reader knows. The reader understands automatically what is being reported are the thoughts, feelings and intentions of your viewpoint character.

Deep POV allows writers to do away with what he thought, he felt, he wondered, he saw, all those phrases that intrude into the fiction, that unnecessarily encumber the story.

Once upon a time such phrases were considered necessary, a way to let your readers know we were in the character’s head or seeing through his or her eyes. With Deep POV, readers are in the character’s head –almost– all the time, and no other intrusions are necessary.

A few examples of simple sentences to show the contrast—

Third-person—

He was lost, Michael thought. Lost and certain someone followed him into the woods.

I’m lost, Michael thought. Lost and certain someone followed him into the woods.

Third-person Deep POV—

He was lost. Lost and certain someone followed him into the woods.

I’m lost. Lost and certain someone followed him into the woods.

➢➣➢➣➤➢➣➢➣

Third-person—

Sherry trailed her quarry down Broadway, careful to look busy with store windows shopping on the opposite side of the street. She giggled when she watched him slip into the Big and Tall Shop and saw him hide behind a mannequin.

Third-person deep POV—

Sherry trailed her quarry—better known as her ex husband—down Broadway, careful to look busy window shopping on the opposite side of the street. She had to laugh when he slipped into the Big and Tall Shop and hide behind a mannequin.

➢➣➣➢➣➢➣

Third-person—

Allen shook his head. It was moronic, he said to himself, the way Zen fawned over his wife’s parents.

Zen threw open his mouth, faking a long laugh.

A moron, Allen thought again, turning away.

Third-person deep POV—

Allen shook his head. It was moronic the way Zen fawned over his wife’s parents.

The loser threw open his mouth, faking a long laugh.

Moron.

Allen turned away.

➢➣➢➣➢➣➢➣

A first-person narrator never needs to identify his or her own feelings and thoughts as being their own. So, the third-person viewpoint character doesn’t have to tell his readers over and over what he or she is thinking or hoping or seeing or feeling. Readers understand the thoughts and hopes and visions and feelings belong to the viewpoint character.

The writer who uses deep POV for his viewpoint character doesn’t have to use markers to tell readers what a character feels—

Melissa reluctantly stuck her hand into the pouch. She thought there was no way she could back out of the dare gracefully. She wiggled her fingers around. She felt slime ooze between them.

Melissa reluctantly stuck her hand into the pouch. There was no way she could back gracefully out of the dare. She wiggled her fingers around, wincing when slime oozed between them.

Using Deep POV rather than the traditional third-person subjective, can cut your word count while keeping the intensity high. It can also keep readers deep in the fiction of the moment rather than reminding them that they are reading a story.

Markers used to remind readers a character is reporting that he’s doing something—felt, saw, watched, thought and so on—become a barrier between readers and the events and emotions of the story. They keep readers one step removed from story events and a character’s feelings.

Removing those reminders pulls your readers deeper into the story’s events and deeper into the character’s mind and heart. When you remove visual physical barrier, the psychological barrier is also separated. Then the reader dives even deeper into the fictional world.

Of course, being in a character’s thoughts and emotions for the length of a story can make readers antsy or induce a sense of claustrophobia. It’s quite okay to draw back at times, to step away from that Deep POV.

When Deep POV is too much

At the opening of a new chapter, help the reader look through a distance lens. Allow scenes to gain perspective and provide relief from Deep POV. Go from the big-picture shot, shifting focus until your viewpoint character is again in the frame, then you can let him or her resume the storytelling.

Switching viewpoint characters lets readers get the view from inside a different head. This gives them a break from the intensity of a single character’s viewpoint.

Remember, however, to switch viewpoint characters only with scene changes. And be choosy about the heads and hearts you dump your readers into. Not every character deserves to tell your story. Not every character is the right character to tell your story.

Richard Draude

IT and Graphics Administrator

Book Blurb by Richard Draude

If you're going to self-publish your book, you must know how to construct the blurb on the back of your book.

Fewer selling tools are more important than a well-written story blurb. For readers, the cover design creates intrigue, but if you catch a potential reader’s attention, the blurb is what will sell your book and bring you new readers. A “blurb” can refer to both a “description blurb” that you write for the back cover of your book and a “review blurb.” For the purpose of this post, I’ll focus on the “description blurb” and how you, the writer, can craft the best possible one.

A Blurb’s Do’s

-Reference the book’s genre and it’s central theme

-Create intrigue around your character’s main conflict

-Dive straight in and introduce your protagonist(s)

-Keep it short and punchy

-Reference your book-writing or professional status, if it relates to your book.

A Blurb’s Don’ts

-Summarize the first chapter

-No spoilers, no matter how tempted you are

-Compare your book to other books, or yourself to other writers

-Open with any overused phrase like, “In a world,”

-Give anything away

-Say how amazing your book is

Anatomy of a Blurb

While there’s no perfect formula for writing the best blurb for your next novel, there are some patterns worth taking note of: Calling out your success in the book-writing world, introducing the reader to the protagonist in a way that creates intrigue without delving into all the assorted details, and referencing the central point of conflict without explaining how a resolution may come about.

Searching online I looked for best sellers and came across these blurbs. Jayne Ann Krentz Secret Sisters, Donna Tartt The Goldfish, and Gilly Macmillan’s debut novel What She Knew.

Take note of patterns, any consistencies, and what the authors seem to be saying—and more important what is he or she is not saying.

Jayne Ann Krentz

Secret Sisters,

THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

Madeline and Daphne were once as close as sisters—until a secret tore them apart. Now it might take them to their graves.

They knew his name, the man who tried to brutally attack twelve-year-old Madeline in her grandmother's hotel. They thought they knew his fate. He wouldn't be bothering them anymore...ever.Still their lives would never be the same.

Madeline has returned to Washington after her grandmother's mysterious death. And at the old, abandoned hotel—a place she never wanted to see again—a dying man’s last words convey a warning: the secrets she and Daphne believed buried forever have been discovered.

Now, after almost two decades, Madeline and Daphne will be reunited in friendship and in fear. Unable to trust the local police, Madeline summons Jack Rayner, the hotel chain’s new security expert. Despite the secrets and mysteries that surround him, Jack is the only one she trusts...and wants.

Jack is no good at relationships but he does possess a specific skill set that includes a profoundly intimate understanding of warped and dangerous minds. With the assistance of Jack's brother, Abe, a high-tech magician, the four of them will form an uneasy alliance against a killer who will stop at nothing to hide the truth....

The Goldfinch,

Donna Tartt.

PULITZER PRIZE WINNER

Theo Decker, a 13-year-old New Yorker, miraculously survives an accident that kills his mother. Abandoned by his father, Theo is taken in by the family of a wealthy friend. Bewildered by his strange new home on Park Avenue, disturbed by schoolmates who don’t know how to talk to him, and tormented above all by his longing for his mother, he clings to the one thing that reminds him of her: a small, mysteriously captivating painting that ultimately draws Theo into the underworld of art.

As an adult, Theo moves silkily between the drawing rooms of the rich and the dusty labyrinth of an antiques store where he works. He is alienated and in love—and at the center of a narrowing, ever more dangerous circle.

The Goldfinch is a mesmerizing, stay-up-all-night and tell-all-your-friends triumph, an old-fashioned story of loss and obsession, survival and self-invention, and the ruthless machinations of fate.

Gilly Macmillan

What She Knew.

THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

In her enthralling debut, Gilly Macmillan explores a mother’s search for her missing son, weaving a taut psychological thriller as gripping and skillful as The Girl on the Train and The Guilty One.

In a heartbeat, everything changes…

Rachel Jenner is walking in a Bristol park with her eight-year-old son, Ben, when he asks if he can run ahead. It’s an ordinary request on an ordinary Sunday afternoon, and Rachel has no reason to worry—until Ben vanishes.

Police are called, search parties go out, and Rachel, already insecure after her recent divorce, feels herself coming undone. As hours and then days pass without a sign of Ben, everyone who knew him is called into question, from Rachel’s newly married ex-husband to her mother-of-the-year sister. Inevitably, media attention focuses on Rachel too, and the public’s attitude toward her begins to shift from sympathy to suspicion.

As she desperately pieces together the threadbare clues, Rachel realizes that nothing is quite as she imagined it to be, not even her own judgment. And the greatest dangers may lie not in the anonymous strangers of every parent’s nightmares, but behind the familiar smiles of those she trusts the most.

Where is Ben? The clock is ticking...

The fewer detail about the plot the better. Draw potential readers in and hook them so they will buy your book and read your story

What is Exposition? By Denice Whitmore

What is exposition? Exposition in a novel is the part of the writing that tells the story. Or, in other words, the important details that drive your story and inform the reader. Here are a few definitions that pertain to writing from www.dictionary.com.

the act of expounding, setting forth, or explaining:

the exposition of a point of view.

writing or speech primarily intended to convey information or to explain; a detailed statement or explanation; explanatory treatise:

The students prepared expositions on familiar essay topics.

 Some things that are included in exposition are, point of view (POV), setting, back story (but only limited), dialogue, description, emotion, thoughts, and many more things.

 Everything you write in your novel should further the plot in some way, build character, give a sense of setting and build tension all from a fixed POV. Good exposition will do these things. Great exposition will do all of them at the same time with as few words as possible. 

How many times have you picked up a book and had to slog through fifteen to twenty pages of back story before anything happens. Back story should only be shared as it becomes relevant. But be careful not to give an info dump. There has to be an active way to introduce back story. Dialogue is a great place to add back story but it must be done carefully. Is the main character confessing something that he did—his deepest darkest secret? Is she uncovering a hidden truth that will change her life for better or worse and shock the reader? You want to tease the reader and let them uncover things from the past that are relevant to the present without dumping a load of irrelevant information on them.

Many people make the mistake of writing talking heads. The ‘he said,’ ‘she said,’ type of dialogue where the characters robotically stand still having a conversation is boring. This is where exposition in narration can really work for you. Your POV character may have thoughts that don’t jive with his words. People move around and interact with each other and their setting. Physical and emotional reactions build character in between dialogue pulling the reader further into the story. Instead of dialogue tags, try writing only with action tags that show emotion, build character, or interact with the setting. It will pull the reader into your world more than ‘he said,’ ‘she said,’.

The most important thing to me as an editor is to make sure the novel has the proper amount of tension. Because what keeps readers turning pages? Tension. When tension builds in a steady arc throughout each chapter, the reader becomes more invested in the characters. What will happen next? How will they get out of that situations? Are they ever going to have that first kiss? Lead your readers on a bit. Make them bite their nails. Keep them awake at night wondering, until they get out of bed to read one more chapter because they have to know what happens next. Tension is an author’s best friend.

 All in all, it can be hard to strike the right balance of the elements that go into your story. Balance is the key. Once you find that proper balance in your exposition, it shows in your writing and readers can’t put your book down.

Here is an excerpt from Knowing Amelia by Jen Atkinson that shows great exposition.

            Sitting up, I felt like a queen, eating my meal in bed. All I needed now were my—oh, no! My books were all downstairs. I couldn’t sit in bed doing nothing all day, and I didn’t have a servant—like a queen should, to order the promptness of my novels. If I kept quiet, maybe she wouldn’t notice me. Maybe I could sneak downstairs and be back to the safety of my room without one grouchy glance from Grandma.

            The creaking of the bedroom door screamed through Dad’s old room. “Shh!” I glared at it. I tiptoed down the wooden staircase without much noise. Creeping over to the living room, I saw my things lying on Amelia’s old square coffee table.

            And then I heard it.

            The horrible blubber came from Amelia’s dining room. Jerking my head upright, I held my breath. What is it? Who is it?

            Again, I heard a weak moan, this time followed by a cry. “Oh, Seth.”

            My racing heart pumped blood through my veins. My eyes widened as the cries grew louder. Each sob, just out of my view, as if it were right next to me. I took one step. Just turn around. Another step. Just walk away. One more—closer. Just get out! But—I had to see.

            Knuckles white, I clutched my book to my chest, my heart thumping against the hard cover of Romeo and Juliet.

            Peeking around the wall separating the two rooms, my eyes focused on the figure before me. Amelia—down on her knees in the dining area. She had moved the table and pulled up one of the wooden floorboards, leaning it against the wall, revealing a hole in the floor. A small wooden box sat beside her, its contents a mystery.

            Sucking in a quiet breath, I let it go—she couldn’t see me. Thank goodness her back faced me. Amelia didn’t know I was there. Her body rocked back and forth with her sobs. “Seth,” she said through another sob. “My Seth.”

            Grandma sat there crying. Her husband of more than fifty years had died and finally—finally she had decided to cry. Even grumpy people should cry when their husbands die.

            Only my grandfather’s name wasn’t Seth.

 Keep writing!

Self Publishing: Four Types of Publishing Part Two by Jo A. Wilkins

The definition of a self-publisher is one who accepts payment from an author for the cost of designing, printing, and distributing his or her book. Frequently, the author invents and registers a publishing "imprint."

Self-published books remain the property of the author and are usually held in the author's possession; all proceeds belong to the author, NONE go back to the people who help you produce it.

Positive points for Self Publishing

• You have complete control over content.
• You tell the self-publishing outlet how you want them to format the book and what you want on the cover.
• You set the pricing.
• You do the research on how much other books like yours sell for and determine how much you need to sell the end product for to recoup what you laid out to produce the book
• You control production
• It is you who decides when the book is ready for publication and each step is completed
• You decide how, when and where to market
• Marketing is the demon in the side of all authors, even those who commercially publish, but in self-publishing it falls solely on the shoulders of the author.

Negative points for Self Publishing

• You bear ALL costs for production
• In this option every expense of production falls on the author. You must keep tract of the costs that will affect your bottom-line if you want to make a profit off the sale of your books
• You are responsible for editing or hiring an editor
• This is a step that most self-publishing authors skip, but it is one that NO author should omit. Having an editor who knows the publishing world will make an enormous difference in the sale of your book
• You must store and distribute your books
• If you choose self-publishing then make sure you use a print-on-demand printer or have enough room to store the books you have printed in bulk (it is less expensive in bulk).
• You are responsible for ALL marketing
• Again, this is the setup that if skipped, will kill the sales of your book. Just listing it for on-line sales will not sell your book.
• Lesser amount of prestige
• If you are publishing your own book it carries less weight than if picked up by a stranger that feels it will sell
• Difficult to tell the difference between a vanity press and a true self-publishing company.
• Readers are not sophisticated enough to tell the difference between true self-publishing and the work behind it and the books that come out of a vanity press.

If you as an author take the road of self-publishing then be prepared for unexpected expenses and a little less prestige to the book you produce. But, remember there are many authors who, down through the ages of publishing history, have utilized self-publishing  Some of the authors and their titles are:

Betty Zane                                          Zane Gray

Elements of Style                                 William Strunk/E.B. White

Huckleberry Finn                                Mark Twain

Leaves of Grass                                    Walt Whitman

Tarzan (1931-1948 Series)                Edgar Rice Burroughs

Legally Blond                                      Amanda Brown

The Four Types of Publishing Part One by Jo Wilkins

What does it mean to get “Published”? Dictionary.com defines it as follows:

Publish: to issue (printed or otherwise reproduced textual or graphic material, computer software, etc.) for sale or distribution to the public.

During my seminars and when I receive queries from writers, I am inundated with questions on how much traditional publishing should cost. The misconception that ‘all publishing has a fee due to the publisher’ is ludicrous. Over the next few months, I would like to break some of the misconceptions on the types of publishing available for the prepared author.

I will present information on the four (4) types of Publishing. These types are defined as:

1.      Traditional Publishing

2.      Subsidized Publishing

3.      Self-Publishing

4.      Vanity Presses

There are a few steps every author needs to prepare before submitting their work for whichever type of publishing you choose. It is imperative to follow these steps before any publisher is allowed to review the manuscript:

1.      Put the manuscript through a grammar and spell check

                       Every word processing program has some version of spell and 

                       grammar check. These simple errors will prevent a publisher from

                       reading more than the first page of your submission.

2.      Make sure your story hits the proper audience

                       Your main character's age should be in the middle of the target

                       audience.

                       Young Adult books should have a main character between late teens                        and 25 years old.

3.      Have a professional editor edit the manuscript.

                       Do some research on who is appropriate for the type of story you are

                       writing. Always get references and have them do sample pages. This is

                       the most important step. Unedited manuscripts printed into books are

                       becoming the ruination of the publishing world.

4.      Carefully read the submissions guidelines for the publisher you choose

                       This is the first test by the publisher and determines whether they put

                       you under contract. If you can’t follow simple directions, they may

                       think you will be difficult to work with and pass over your wonderful

                       manuscript.

A commercial or traditional publisher is one who distributes books under its own imprint. It puts the manuscripts from authors under contract and handles the cost of producing those manuscripts: Cover and interior design, formatting, printing, marketing in conjunction with the author, distribution, etc. The author is not expected to pay any of these costs. The cost of marketing generally falls to the author. The copyright on these books is leased by the publisher and remains in the publisher's possession until the contract expires. The author receives a percentage of sales in the form of royalties outlined in the contract. Using a commercial/traditional publisher has the following advantages:

* Advances and royalties.

                 Some imprints have the resources to give advances, but not usually for 

                 first-time authors.

*  No cost to author.

                 This is very important to remember - Commercial/traditional publishers will 

                 never charge you any type of fee.

*  Prestige.

                 Reputation of the imprint is important, so do your research. Some small

                 houses may not be well known, but may have a great reputation with their

                 authors and their peers.

*  National Marketing.

                 For reviews and distribution.

*  Everything for producing your book is done by the imprint.

                 Remember, you should not be charged for any of this.

Realizing that it takes from $3,000 to $5,000 to properly bring a book to the reading public, there are some things you should be aware of that may keep you from using the commercial/traditional route.

*  It can be very difficult to get published─100,000+ manuscripts are submitted each year.

                  Publishers, in most cases, are part of an old-boy network and it is very

                  difficult to enter their network without connections.

*  You are still responsible for a large part of the marketing for your book.

                  Some imprints have you write another book on how or what you are willing

                  to do to help market your book.

*  Very small number of manuscripts selected each year.

                  Get to know agents and publishers at conferences and workshops so you can
                  help your submission stay out of the slush pile.

*  Publisher has a greater degree of control over your work.

                  You will not have any say in cover art, blurbs for the book cover, etc., unless

                  the publisher agrees to let you have some say in the book production.

*  Limited amount of money earned for each book sold.

                  Most contracts give royalties of 10% to 12% (depending on the resources of the                   imprint)

In 2010, the Sunday Times of London sent 20 British publishers and agents previously published prize-winning books as manuscripts. These manuscripts were represented as new authors seeking publishers. Two examples were the opening chapters of, In a Free State, by V.S. Naipaul, who won the Nobel Prize for Literature, and Holiday, by Stanley Middleton. The object of this effort was to see if the agents or publishing houses could distinguish true talent.

Both of these were Booker prize winners from the 1970s and were lauded as British novel writing at its best. None of the publishers or agents recognized the manuscripts. Some rejected both Booker prize-winning novels. Of the 21 replies received, all but one were rejections.

Responding to the Naipaul manuscript, in which only the author's name and the names of the characters had been changed, a submissions department reader for PDF, a major London literary agency, wrote: "Having considered your material, we do not feel, we are sorry to say, not sufficiently enthusiastic or confident about it."

The Blake Friedmann agency also sent apologies: "In order to take on a new author, several of us here would need to be extremely enthusiastic about both the content and writing style. I'm sorry to say we don't feel that strongly about your work."

A few publishers and agents, when they realized they had been stung, blamed the sheer volume of manuscripts they received and lack of time to read every page. "With other forms of entertainment today there are very few people around who would understand what a good paragraph is," added Naipaul.

Nicholas Clee, former editor of The Boookseller magazine, said publishers are no longer eager to take risks on untried authors because they face fierce competition as supermarkets force down prices. "Publishers tend to go for newcomers who have something sensational to offer, or authors with established names. They're putting big promotional efforts behind just a few titles," he said.

My advice as an author and a publisher, knowing how hard it is to get past the first hurdles of submissions and now seeing some of the badly done submissions we receive here at Ink & Quill and NewLink,, is never send out your first draft. Make sure that you have it reviewed by someone who knows what the industry is looking for. Make it spot on perfect in grammar, spelling and content. In other words, learn the craft you plan to pursue before you submit it to the industry.